The First Family

I am having a hard time with this, folks. These shallow, entitled billionaires are a step in the wrong direction for this country. But we've been marching along this path for many years, so the final steps aren't a surprise - just a huge disappointment.

These are some of the things The Guardian thinks we "need to know" about the Trumps.

Melania

She also plans to combat online bullying and harassment.

  Guardian

Let me guess...she thinks her husband gets bullied online, not that he does the bullying.

She is remaining in New York City through the end of the school year with her son with Trump, Barron, 10, and is expected to play a minimal role in the administration.

Eye Candy is a new position in the White House.

Donald Jr

Like his father, a reality TV star (The Apprentice), he has been tapped to head the Trump Organization – the family business empire – with his brother, Eric, aided by a longtime company executive.

Because Trump himself does not want to actually give up his businesses while in office.

Trump Jr is not expected to have a role in his father’s administration; indeed, his new position as co-head of the Trump Organization would seem to preclude, under ethics rules and traditions, his speaking with his father about the business, or his hearing from his father about government.

I might believe he's not going to hear about government from his father, because his father isn't going to be actually governing, and he might not even talk to his father about business since he's going to have a babysitter (a longtime company executive) and won't actually be running any company, but I'll never believe any of it has to do with ethics or traditions.

He is a big-game hunter and self-described “boob guy”.

And just plain boob.

Eric

He runs a charitable foundation to fight childhood cancer, but claims he has made about his father personally donating large sums to the foundation, like many Trump family claims about charitable giving, could not be verified.

Imagine that.

Like his brother he is a big-game hunter.

And they've downed the biggest game of all now through no effort of their own.

Ivanka

She is a fashion executive and like her brothers has appeared on The Apprentice. As an executive with the Trump organization, she managed projects including the recently opened Trump hotel in the Old Post Office building in downtown Washington DC, but she has said she will divest from the family company, owing to her husband’s role in the Trump administration.

Apparently the only one with any real business sense.

The nature of her divestment is not clear; it has been described by Trump transition officials as “converting” her equity into fixed payments.

Hmmmmm.

Mr. Ivanka Trump

Raised in New Jersey and the grandchild of Holocaust survivors, [Jared Kushner] has a bachelor’s degree from Harvard and a law degree from New York University.

Well, there goes Palestine.

He took over his family’s real estate firm after his father was imprisoned on a federal felony conviction for witness tampering and tax evasion.

Ah, heir to Meyer Lansky.

Kushner is also owner and publisher of the New York Observer, and has said he is in the process of withdrawing from both the real estate firm and the newspaper as part of his transition to senior adviser to his father-in-law. [...] presuming he is not found to have breached federal anti-nepotism laws.

Which nobody is going to actually fight about, because the Democrats, now that they've accepted they aren't in control, are now scrambling to make sure they can take advantage of the seriously pro-corporate administration they've been handed. So, no problem. And don't expect any Trump scrutiny from the New York Observer in the future.

Tiffany

[Marla] Maples, 53, a former model and actress, is Trump’s second wife and the mother of his fourth child, Tiffany, 23. Maples is now an activist and singer-songwriter, while Tiffany is a recent college graduate. Neither is expected to have a role in the Trump administration.

That's it.  That's all they have to say about Tiffany.  More info there about Tiffany's mother than Tiffany. Something tells me she won't be seen much anyway.  "Neither is expected to have a role in the Trump administration."  And one might not even get to come in the building.  Meow.

[Trump's] current wife, Melania Trump, will be the nation’s next first lady but his ex-wives Ivana Trump and Marla Maples will also be present to witness the 70-year-old’s swearing-in ceremony.

According to People, Maples will be present at the event with the rest of Trump’s family. While Tiffany, the daughter she has with Trump, will be flown in to Washington, D.C., Maples will have to pay for her own travel expenses, People reported citing sources.

  IB Times

Donald's making a statement?

Maples and Trump wed in December 1993, two months after the birth of Tiffany.

There's just so much I didn't know about this regal family. Was Himself perhaps married to Ivana when Marla became pregnant?

The now 53-year-old actress and Trump were allegedly in a relationship when the real estate mogul was still married to his first wife.

"Allegedly"?

[She] moved to southern California after the divorce “to focus on finding a quieter, more spiritual existence.”

Wait a minute.  Maples is an activist?  This deserves some research. Either they meant "actress" or this is what they count as "activism"...

Maples is committed to supporting charities and non-profit organizations, and is a long time and vocal advocate of Kids Creating Peace, an organization uniting Israeli and Palestinian children. She has shared proceeds of sales with those in need; she shared sales proceeds of her One World of Love album with Success for Kids, and proceeds from her auction with Linda's Stuff went to Spirituality for Kids.

  Wikipedia

"Uniting Israeli and Palestinian children." Interesting.

Maples' album The Endless, released in August 2013, is a musical journey of spiritual awakening and transformational energy, featuring thought leaders such as the Dalai Lama, Michael Beckwith, and Deepak Chopra. Each track seeks to evoke a different level of consciousness and connection, designed for deep meditation, prayer circles, or yoga sessions.

[...]

She is a self-proclaimed 'mostly-vegan' who avoids dairy, eats organic, and chooses to be gluten free.

[...]

Maples hosted her own talk radio show, Awakening with Marla, on Contact Talk Radio; her guests included naturopathic doctors, authors, and astrologers.

Yeah, they'll be keeping her out of the House.

In January 2000, a memoir by Maples, All That Glitters Is Not Gold, was announced by the ReganBooks division of HarperCollins Publishers. In February 2002, a spokeswoman for the publishing company said that ''The author and publisher by mutual consent have agreed not to publish the book.''

I wonder what that cost The Inflatable Rooster.

...but hey, do what you want...you will anyway.

UPDATE:

Looks painful.

They let Tiffany come to tote the books.