Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Some Ideas Are Better Than Others

“It wouldn’t have happened if the schools allowed the employees to carry firearms,” she told me or words to that effect, but absolutely parroting the NRA talking points. It set me off.

To which –as a sonofalawyer–I could only reply, “Let’s think this through. What calibre do you suggest? What model? Automatic or manual? Rifle, hand gun, something else? If you are going to propose this, you need to have a standard gun issued, so what will it be?”

Do the staff shoot to kill or just to wound? What if the target is one of the students, does that change things? Will teachers have immunity from prosecution for shooting their students or other people on the campus?

You want to train Teacher Union members how to shoot guns? (I swear she flinched at that point, it was pretty funny.) What will be the certification process to prove that they’re good shots. What about the substitute teachers? Will teachers get better guns as they go up the pay scale? What happens if a good teacher is a poor shot? What if the teacher doesn’t want to shoot anyone? Do you fire him or her? What happens when the teachers go on strike? Do you train the scabs?

Who is going to pay for the guns, the ammo, the training? What’s the insurance policy going to cost to cover accidents, or stolen guns being used in other crimes? How often do you replace the ammo to keep it fresh? How do you budget yearly ammo? How do you account for it at the end of the year? What happens if some ammo goes missing?

How much ammo should schools have on hand? Where will these weapons be stored? How will they be stored? Where will the ammo be stored? Where will this stuff go during the summer and when school in not in session?

I don’t know if it changed her mind (I doubt it), but I think she will be careful about saying stuff like this around me again.

  Mock, Paper, Scissors

Excellent points. To which we could also add: now the student killer doesn’t have to bring his own weapon to school. He just has to knock a teacher on the head. Or arm-wrestle an old one.

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